Betrayal to Betrayal

It began with the betrayal of one sort and then of another and then of another. But eventually it became a mutant cell in my soul. Just kept me drawing to itself and claiming shreds of conscience one after the other. Till I could no longer differentiate between the sense of possession and the sense of loss, sense of belonging and the sense of abandonment, sense of craving and the sense of satiation, sense of knowledge and the sense of ignorance, sense of focus and the sense of wanderlust, sense of control and the sense of surrender. It just kept gnawing at me and I kept bleeding and tearing apart.

You probably thought that I was weak and an emotional fool. But what you failed to see was that I was only letting the game of betrayal take its usual course and play its turn. I played my turn by confiding in you and trying to give it all a fair chance and then betrayal took charge to bring me and dump me home after a full cricle of trials, contraction and expansion of my (never yours) emotions and space.

And then I was left to suffer the familiar condition of the consequences I inflicted on me yet again . It all works just fine. I let betrayal take various forms to lead me to the ultimate state of – loss, abandonment, craving, ignorance, surrender, wanderlust and GUILT.

The Law of Attraction indeed is obedient. It only allows pairing up with the similar ilks.

Betrayal to the betrayal of self.

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One thought on “Betrayal to Betrayal

  1. I dont quite understand… who betrayed whom?
    Well anyways…I’m reading your blog quite a time now and I think I should comment on this one..
    please explain the sentence “Betrayal to the betrayal of self”..I don’t quite get it.

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